pilipinas

When You Marry a Filipina Jealousy YOUR COMMENTS

 

By LuToiya

Topic:  Why are Filipinas so Jealous?  Check out Lutoiya’s Youtube channel (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFx7X7KfCc_QuzTFRwQjiCA); Instagram: mcnastylifestyle
Apologies in advance for the wall of text below: Biologically speaking, I am 1/2 Filipina and I grew up around a lot of Filipinas in Guam. I feel qualified to speak on this subject even though i’m not “culturally” Filipina. (I wasn’t raised in the Philippines and anyone who has spent 5 minutes with me will tell you that there’s almost nothing “conservative” or “Traditional” about me or my husband.) I feel like I can offer perspective on this from a female standpoint.
Despite what some people think. Filipinas are not more or less jealous than any other group of women. Thai women, Chamorro women, American Women, European women and even men can be just as jealous, for example, can be just as jealous as women from the Philippines if not more so under similar circumstances. Jealousy (in my humble opinion) stems from insecurity. Sometimes the more you care about something or someone the more fear of loss you have. The greater the perceived threat, the more jealousy rears its’ head. The more secure the relationship is, the higher the threshold to trigger the instinctive jealousy reflex.
When my husband and I first entered a serious committed relationship, we had our own issues with jealousy. The prettier the girl or the more handsome the guy is… or the more appealing the outside element is, the more of a threat they are perceived to be. The greater the perceived threat the more potential there is for insecurity inside the relationship. Insecurity is the seed of almost all jealousy in a relationship. Did I choke a bitch and punch her in the face at a Bone Thugs in Harmony concert for flirting with my man? You’re DAMN RIGHT I did… but that was before my husband and I’s relationship evolved to a place where we feel secure enough in our relationship to let these bitches draw breath except for in cases of extreme transgression, hehe. 😉
Solution time: Advice for guys, examine yourself. Are you giving your woman a REASON to be jealous? Are you playing games with her emotions? Are you out all night? Have you really torn up your “player card” or is it still in your back pocket? Are you contacting your exes? Are you staying out all night and not answering your phone or responding to text messages? Are you doing everything you can to make your woman feel secure in the relationship? Does she have a reason not to trust you? Be honest with yourself. The antidote for the poison of jealousy is security. If she is rational, the more secure a woman feels in the relationship and the less doubt she has about your intentions, the less jealousy she will feel. If your woman is rational and if you go out of your way in the beginning to show her that you love her and that your not out there trying to make her look stupid, the walls will start to come down over time and jealousy should be less and less of an issue as time progresses in the relationship (barring any incidents of infidelity, perceived or otherwise.)
Advice for girls: Step 1 Choose well. Trust your gut instinct but give the guy the benefit of the doubt if you know he’s a good guy. If he’s not a good guy, then why the hell are you with him in the first place!? (please refer to step 1)
Examine YOUR attitude FIRST before you “freak out” on your partner. Whenever you feel the jealousy bubbling up from your stomach it’s time to evaluate your feelings RATIONALLY. Did HE give you a REASON through his ACTION to cause you to feel this way? Can you point to any action that he has taken (either directly or indirectly) to provoke insecurity in your relationship? Are you mad at this guy for no reason? Does HE really deserve a night of tampo just because some random girl showed up at the party looking fierce in a sexy red dress? The answer is probably “no”.
Men don’t possess the same emotional palate that we women do and sometimes things fly right over their head. If you can’t articulate the reasoning behind the negative attitude you are showing him in a rational way and point to something tangible that he actually DID to cause you to feel jealous emotions then maybe it IS just – as Bruce alluded to in the video – just your “pain body” talking. Discuss with your man. Be open and honest with your feelings and if he IS a good guy then for god’s sake cut the poor man some slack. 🙂
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ITE7yBUegQ

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Tags : filipinafilipina jealousyjealousytampo
Yuri Sincero

The author Yuri Sincero

Hello my valued readers!! :-) This is Yuri. Here is my thought! Thanks a lot for inspiring me to keep writing. My articles here in Efilipinowomen are about the culture, K-1 visa, current events, dating, marriages and traditions of the Philippines. You can add your comments, suggestions and feedback . I'm open for improvement :-) . You can also email me or send me a message in facebook. See you!!!.... Google and Facebook.